Interesting....but not surprising
| You are Agonistic |
You're not sure if God exists, and you don't care.
For you, there's no true way to figure out the divine.
You rather focus on what you can control - your own life.
And you tend to resent when others "sell" religion to you. |
Thanks Kim!
If you have never heard of this....you must just go take a minute to read up. It is funny, smart and gives me that "Yep, someone else out there understands" warm feeling in my belly.
http://www.venganza.org/index.htmOPEN LETTER TO KANSAS SCHOOL BOARDI am writing you with much concern after having read of your hearing to decide whether the alternative theory of Intelligent Design should be taught along with the theory of Evolution. I think we can all agree that it is important for students to hear multiple viewpoints so they can choose for themselves the theory that makes the most sense to them. I am concerned, however, that students will only hear one theory of Intelligent Design.
Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel. We feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him.....
click link above to read more...
HOLY SHIT
So, today is the day. I am sitting here, at 9:00AM in front of my computer. Tickets go on pre-sale today for the Atlanta Depeche Mode date. I might throw up. Seriously. I am scared that I might not be able to type through the tears when ordering. I am terrified that they will run out of presale tickets. I am almost ready to give a few people my credit card info so I can be sure to get tickets....I will just have several pair.
I can't explain what this does to me. When I say it out loud it is just crazy. I am nervous, like when I was about to get married. Not nervous about if I will be happy, if its a good idea, but nervous that it won't be what I expect, all I will hope it will be. Right now, I am just really really scared that my router will die, that my laptop will freeze, that ticketmaster will have a malfunction and I will lose my chance.
I am wiggin. Totally wiggin.
How do you tell someone...
"I am sorry you are in hell, but its the hell of your own creation and you deserve it?"
My sister is in a hell of her own creation. She won't get help for her addictions and is relying on my parents for financial support. She is living with my mother and her husband. Together, they have 5 dogs. My sister's dog and my mother's dog fight a lot. My mother's husband got bit today pulling them apart and a screaming match of "Fuck You's" ensued.
I am sorry that she is going through this. But no one feels sorry for me wearing a size 24. I ate the brownies. No one shoved them in my mouth. No one held me down on the sofa so I couldn't go exercise. No one gives me money for clothes when my old clothes don't fit anymore because I get fatter.
So why should I feel bad for her when she calls crying because she hates living with my mom's husband? When she only has $8 to her name? When she is lonely because she has alienated all her friends and family?
Smart People are Good.
I found this paragraph while reading online today. I was talking to a good friend this past week and she told me that what I believe isn't all that odd and gave it a name. So I looked it up just to see if what I think meshes with the actual words. From what I found, there are a lot of similarities.
I am still amazed that my beliefs were born out of what I think, not what someone else taught, not what I read in a book, only the 33 years that I have been alive an all of my experiences. Its what I wish for so many people who won't take the time to look inward and see how they really feel.
Anyhoo, I was so happy to find this, that I just wanted to put it somewhere so I can read it later when I need some reinforcements.
This paragraph found in The Dharma of Dragons and Daemons: Buddhist Themes in Modern Fantasy, by David R. Loy and Linda Goodhew (Wisdom Publications, 2004) needs to be added to this essay:
"The problem of 'collective ego' (or 'wego') refers to the fact that we tend to reinforce each other's greed, ill will, and delusion, thereby creating collective evil. The most disastrous example of such collective evil is not the group-sanctioned violence of war but human devastation of the earth, our mother as well as our home. From a Buddhist perspective, our most problematical individual delusion is the self - in other words, the sense of separation between oneself and others. Collectively, our most problematical delusion is the same: that is, the alienation between our group and another, between our nation and their nation, between our religion and their religion, between Homo sapiens and the rest of the biosphere - the last duality based on a collective stupidity regarding our interdependence with nature." (pp. 91, 92)
The two funniest things...
To come out thus far:
Its REAL!!!
ARE YOU DEAF?
Each night Phil takes Vivienne up to take a bath and I sit in the chair, looking at the remote on the sofa, wondering why the television is SO DAMN LOUD. Each night I go over and turn it down from #23 or so to #9. At this rate, I will de deaf.
My mom's husband does this too. You can be anywhere in their house and hear the television if its on. Whether it be sports, a movie or a gameshow (yes, he is a Mensa member), the volume is past where I can concentrate enough to breathe. Do all men do this?
So, you want to respect a memory??
How about starting out by not reliving the tragedy over and over. Let's all ban together and refuse to watch the planes hit, the towers collapse, the fear and horror on the innocent's faces. Let's all choose to remember the lives of the people lost. Let us celebrate the 'heros' (and I DO NOT use this lightly) that proceeded to do their job in the face of terrifying horror. Let's see photos of them at their happiest. Let us talk to the families about the good times, about what they have learned, about how they are living their lives every day to honor the loved ones they have lost.
But I say we all make a pact to not sit on our sofa and watch news shows try to shock us over and over and over. I don't want to see it. I don't want to relive that day, those feelings, the hopelessness and terror. I will remember the people who lost their lives. I will remember the forces that banned together, the leadership of the Mayor (who I really don't like as a politician, but he was such a great leader during this) who we all grew to admire even if we never had before.
Lastly, let's all take a day to make sure we enjoy our own families. Make it a point to tell people you love them, give someone an extra second of eye contact, tell them how you really feel, how much you value them as a person. THIS would be the way to remember September 11th. Not flashy news reports and fake empathizing by news reporters...
ET, go home.
I hate these shows. Please, let me tell you why.
Entertainment Tonight: This show must think all viewers have the IQ of a pigeon. First, they tell me about the feature story that they have on that night. Then, they give me teases about it, maybe a flash of a photo and a blurb halfway through, then "Coming soon" animation at each commercial break. Finally, the credits roll over the photo of what was the feature story. Really, it was a 15 second clip of Britney Spears drinking a Frappuccino walking from her car into a beige building. That was it. That was what you spent that last 30 minutes waiting for.
But the WORST, the absolute worst, was this week. There is Mary Hart, all shiny, tan and blonde with a sparkly necklace of Austrian Crystal in a Meridian Blue blazer standing...get this....in front of the Houston Astrodome. She was "reporting" (read: reading off cue cards) about the Katrina aftermath..oh, and J-Lo's outfit on the red carpet at her movie's premier.
Are you kidding me??? How long do you have to shower after you get home? How much soap does it take Mary Hart to feel clean after doing a show like that? Do you think she growls in between takes and slurps from a flask? How about snorts coke in the trailer before coming to her set?
The show, all these shows (don't even get me started on Inside Edition) just make my blood boil. If you have the word ENTERTAINMENT in your title, don't report on real news like you have any knowledge of how to do so. Freak. What makes you think your audiences want to see that? They want to know which celebrity was voted 'most sexiest ever, always". Not what FEMA is doing. Hell, I am sure they think FEMA stands for "Fine Entertainment Matters Always".
Hell Yeah - Its ALL About the Hair!!!
| Your 80s Heartthrob Is |
 John Stamos |
Who's Your 80's Heartthrob? Take This Quiz :-)
The Situation Room
I love this show. It is on CNN between 3pm and 6pm. Its Wolf Blitzer in front of a wall of tv screens being flashed with footage from every news story of the day. He shoots from person to person, from interview to interview in flashes. He stands in front of these screens and talks into a mike with an earpiece. Its HILARIOUS! It is so much more like an SNL skit than a news show.
Today, his big question for everyone is "Have you seen the bodies?" and "Are there piles of bodies?" and "Where are the bodies and how many are there?". He won't stop. He is TRYING to pain a picture of bodies PILED up on the curb on every corner. He can't get anyone to be gross, be devastating and be shocking.
You should check it out though...its great.
Dissed
I try not to take these things too personally. But my poor self esteem doesn't have a lot of extra to give. Here is the deal:
I got my hair but about two weeks ago. I had approximately 4 inches cut off, bangs created, many many layers put in. Its funky, messy and suh-weet. I saw my mother and sister the week before. My mother saw me two days after my hair cut and didn't notice. My sister saw me Thursday and didn't notice.
This past Saturday, I got it dyed. Its a lovely dark red all over, lighter in the front at the bangs and a bright (think Ronald MacDonald) red at the crown and around the neck - which is much prettier in person than in writing. My sister sees me again on Sunday, never says a word.
Phil likes to brush it off as my family not paying attention to anything that is not smacking them in the face...or just plainly has to do directly with them. Of course, me being a little more sensitive, wonders why no one sees me. Again Phil tells me this is not true. Unfortunately, I am not sure if he would notice my hair if he didn't already know I was getting it done and was here when I walked back in the door afterwards.
I do think Ronni (Wednesday dinner date) would notice without me saying anything. But she is more observant than the average person, a quality that keeps her on my BESTEST FRIEND list, always. And to everyone else's credit, I do change my hair color often. If you don't see me in a few months, you can bet that you missed quite a few changes. But these are people who just saw me the week before. Still, nothing.
Sad, it sucks and its sad.
This will be quick
Last night, I was watching the nightly local news when they announced that William Rehnquist died. My heart sank, I began to tear up, I was deflated.
There isn't much to say, since this is all speculation and out of my control. But I have to say a few things:
I am terrified that my child will be stripped of her future rights as a woman when the President nominates a conservative, Christian judge.
I am terrified that women everywhere will lose their rights as a human being when some man decides whether or not she can decide the outcome of a pregnancy.
I am sickened at the fact that Christianity is looming on the horizon, waiting to re-infiltrate my schools, government and life in general. What will I do then? I don't want Vivienne to go to a school that teaches her that life created when an imaginary 'thing' waved his arms and "POOF!" the earth was made. Your book of stories is a nice one. Your fables and morals do make sense. But I don't believe them. They do not govern my life or my mind. KEEP THEM AWAY FROM ME AND MY FAMILY. I don't care what you believe, so leave my alone.
Stuff and Things
I have spent the last 6 days flopping between guilt, happiness and concern. It is hard to have feelings and want so badly to figure out why. Finally, without anyone else to talk to, I talked to Phil. I trust that he will tell me the truth. After all, I wouldn't have married him if he didn't at least try to understand my side.
I asked him about why he thought I had the thoughts and feelings that I did. I wonder if I just don't totally get it. Without being able to type it all out, I am just giving the overview.
Part of me is devastated that no one helped the survivors of the hurricane sooner. I agonized each day and night, staying glued to the TV. I cried, I was pissed, I had headaches every day and night from worry. I saw these people, who obviously have so much less than myself or anyone I know, struggling to survive against a natural disaster that they had absolutely no control over.
Or did they? I understand that they were unable to evacuate. I get that they couldn't afford to stock a pantry/ freezer/ fridge with food. But I even know hurricane preparedness means filling your bathtub up with water before you lose it. I know that you need to find all possible containers and fill them with clean water in case the drinking water is compromised. I know the need for candles and a radio with batteries. Were they simply unprepared? Did they think that as soon as it was over, they would be instantly helped and saved?
I feel guilty for thinking these thoughts in their time of despair. I feel awful for being angry at some looting, but also understanding that I don't know what I would do. I know myself well enough to know that I wouldn't be breaking into jewelry stores and ATM machines. This was happening the FIRST DAY. This was happening DURING THE HURRICANE. When I see these images, its hard to feel for human beings that don't help themselves. I see people yelling at TV cameras about "Get me Help" and yelling about how this wouldn't have happened if they were white.
I so badly don't want this to turn into a race issue. If this had happened in Arizona, in southern California, in Southern Texas, would we be saying that the US hates Latinos? If it happened in Maine, Massachusetts or Conneticut would we say it was because we hate white people? It says to me that the city of New Orleans have never taken care of their people and their people have never tried to take care of themselves. I am so sick of the name calling and finger pointing by all the usual suspects.
Yes, there was a breakdown between all the branches and levels of government. Yes, Louisiana always knew this was a possibility. Why tell people to go to a shelter and have nothing for them? Why be angry at a country when your direct government failed you FIRST, then wanted immediate help when they were unprepared themselves?
I find myself overcompensating now. I was at the mall grinning like an idiot at all the black people. I was trying my best to emanate the feeling "I DON'T HATE YOU." How stupid is that? I am not to blame. I should not have to feel guilty about who I am and how I was brought into being. I did not choose to be me any more than a poor woman in New Orleans chose to be herself.
I can feel this going on and on and on. I am not sure if I will get more angry before I let it go or more guilty before its over.
Happiness. Now thats a new one.
Cnn Gay Marriage Approved in California SenateI was overjoyed to read this today. Anyone that knows me should know that I am more than 100% behind the fact that gay couples should have every right that my husband and I do. EVERY RIGHT.
There is no logical (which leaves out any religious reasons) to not allow these people to become a couple in the eyes of the government. I don't give a rat's ass if churches say its ok. Nothing they say matters to me in the first place. But to not allow HUMAN BEINGS the right to love in the open and share their lives like any other couple is a disgrace to humankind.
Kudos to the California Senate, even though their state contains a bunch o'freaks.
