We do stuff.:
"Welcome to the world's most dynamic e-business marketing, design and consulting agency. We provide distinct clients with groundbreaking business strategies and cutting-edge designs to aggressively and creatively compete in a changing economy.
Our consulting ideas will entice and excite you. Our professional design solutions will give you the confidence to succeed. And our web site will make you think we know what we're doing.
Our name will confuse you, but, you have to admit, the logo design is pretty cool. And we're good at turning regular words into 'e-words,' such as 'e-consulting,' 'e-business' or 'e-sexual harassment.'
Our office is really modern and we've got nice computers and stuff. If you ever saw it, you'd say 'Wow, cool office. These guys are legit.'
"
"I See the Whole World"
"I am too busy to notice details....."
This is what my mom tells me this morning. She stayed with me last night to help me out with my long weekend and my long overdue 'get reacquainted' dinner with one of my bestest friends.
She arrived at 9am on Saturday. She never noticed the cabinets in the kitchen now have new and newly painted doors. For 5 years we have had open kitchen cabinets, so its not like a thing that can go unnoticed. Its a HUGE difference. She finally said something this morning around 10am. Nice.
Then she got up at 7am and got Vivienne out of bed (Why didn't you just sleep?- Um...I can't sleep through loud talking in a 900 sq ft house.) While she played with her, I took the sheets off the sofa where she slept, replaced the cushions and the pillows. I folded the blanket and got the room back together. At 8am, after we have sat on the sofa and watched tv, played with Vivienne in the room, and began to get dressed, she comes into the bedroom and says "I am going to get the stuff off the couch now."
I was amazed. How could you not notice it? So, I say "Mom, you are about the most non-observant person in the universe!" (see also post about striking brown hair). She answers "No, I see the whole world, I take everything in, I am too busy for the details."
Um no, you are self centered and rude. That is the real reason.
Single Mom-ing it
Phil is leaving for Chicago tomorrow. He leaves for 4 days. I now plenty of women out there do it alone every day. I know many more have husbands that leave for days at a time and go out of town. Phil hasn't left me as of yet.
He leaves Friday at noon. We have a busy weekend planned, but I can't help thinking that I will be lonely and bored of Vivienne by the time he returns. Especially since he will come back Monday afternoon and go to work Tuesday morning. SO much for a little break for me.
Since Vivienne has been born, I have gone to 2 work functions and 1 overnight trip for fun. I know its Phil's turn, but I am still secretly terrified about being alone with her for so long. Even though my mom will be here and we are heading to IKEA on Saturday to see my grandparents. Even though I will have a really great dinner with an old friend, even though I will have some much needed me pampering time (toenail painting anyone?), I would trade it all for having him stay here. I am such a goober.
Brag
I had a "My kid is the cutest EVER" kind of day yesterday. I am sure that all moms have had this at least once.
We went to the post office and had 4 clerks come out and visit with her. She got a lollipop from one lady and a sticker from the other. Maybe it was just because it was Valentine's Day, but everyone was just swooning. Of course, being the person that I am in the current psycological state I am in, my fear was that they were all asking themselves "Is that hers? But she so U-G-L-Y." Funny, huh?
At 130am last night I went in to check on her, having lost track of time and getting to be VERY late. She woke suddenly when I was getting ready to leave, so I had to just freeze. Phil walked by the room and turned off the hall lights in hopes that she would just fall back to sleep. No dice.
She popped up when she heard the cat come in and crawled to the end of the bed to say "Bye Kitty" when she walked out. All the while she doesn't see me in the room. I am in shadow and totally still. Then she had some coversation with herself about milk, snow, monkeys and big bird. At least those were the parts that I could make out. I thought she was slowing down only to have her pop back up and sing the ABC song while bouncing on her knees. 145am.
Phil gets out of bed and sticks his head in the hallway, something I can only see becuase the room I am in is so dark. Finally, after holding in lots and lots of giggles, I open the door and Vivienne sees Phil .... "Ahhhh Hi Daddy!"
She pops onto her feet and bounds back and forth in her crib singing. Phil and I are laughing so hard we can't breathe. Finally, we have to let her know its time to sleep. I leave, Phil lays her down and we had a nice 5 minutes of mad screaming, crying and yelling before all was silent as we fell asleep.
715am. Wake to more about milk, snow and big bird.
The horrid stomach flu hit our house this week. I won't go into details until I am more up to share. Right now, the very thought is too much to handle. Phil and Vivienne are both having "naptime" as I try and catch up on 2 days worth of being on a sofa, reading. Although I had to puke for 6 hours and things much darker were happening elsewhere, I really enjoyed my whole day of leisure yesterday. Now THAT is just sick.
Can I help you WHAT?!?!?!
Against my better judgement, I picked up the phone today when the caller ID said "Private Number". The man on the phone stuttered a bit while trying to get his words out. I figure this is the worst telemarketer EVER because he can't finish one solid thought.
After mumbling for about a minute, I say "excuse me?" and he replies "Um, I am trying to jack off. Can you talk to me until I do?"
"Um. No." This is what went through my head. What came out of my mouth was "Um. HAHAHAHAHHAHA." CLICK. He called back and I picked it up and immediately hung up. Then I went online and disabled my ability to receive calls from "Private Number".
Funny the things that happen to Stay At Home Moms.
Yum.
Striking
My mom came over yesterday. The last time she was here was last Saturday. Since then, I have dyed my hair dark dark brown (as opposed to its previous varied shades of red on the picture to the right).
She was here for about 5 minutes until she looked up and said "Meredith, did you dye your hair? It's striking."
So not only did mom not notice for a number of minutes, but when she does, she tells me it is "striking". I hate to break it to you mom, but if it was striking, you would have noticed it when I opened the door and let you in.
This, alone, should give you an insight to the obliviousness that my mother lives in.
This is one of my favorite sights. Growing up with a mom who used to "doo-doo-da-da-da" to lyrics she didn't know drove me nuts. Now I MUST know the lyrics or I will not sing the song. On the other hand, I will instantly make fun of someone for singing the wrong thing. I am such a jerk. But. Meh, when you spend as much of your life researching the lyrics, one must be proud and stand up for what she believes in.
I think often about my dad telling me that if I spent as much time on homework as I did on learning lyrics, I would be a genius. Who says knowing all the words to "Its the End of the World as We Know It" by R.E.M. isn't a talent? You try it. Its hard. Even Michael Stipe needed a cheat sheet on that one.
Fade to Black
I decided last night to dye my hair dark brown. Its such a major switch from the shades of red it has been for the last 15 years, that I am having a fun time with it.
I did it jet black many years ago and looked so awful. It was amusing. When it faded, it turned green. Thankfully, I have a lot of fun with my hair and never take it too seriously. But, of course, I don't take anything too seriously so it would make sense.
Today, I put on all black and red lipstick and went to the grocery store feeling all geisha. Made me smile.
Tonight, blonde stripes. MORE FUN!
